Coming Soon: FaF Sportsbook

Ahhh it’s July in Houston. The smell of Independence Day BBQ’s is fading, the heat and humidity is becoming more ungodly, and there is absolutely nothing going on in the sports world worth more than ten seconds of attention. It gets harder and harder to pass the work days (or in some of our cases, sit at home day). It’s just a tad early to start fantasy football research and draft preparations (or is it???). So, most of us find other things to do like argue about how good Case Keenum really is on message boards, gamble on which celebrity will be next to die, or play Let’s Golf on your iPhone while updating the live blog of the Michael Jackson’s Memorial (much better than watching it I assume). Well, let me give you a taste of what’s coming next from FaF.

Inspired by this link, which Reginald Blackstone will be putting money on Texas to win the BCS title within 45 seconds of clicking on it. We have decided FaF should move offshore and start a gambling website.

Reginald could be in charge of all the standard NFL and NBA lines, as well as standard futures and the racebook.

Septimus would be in charge of administration, web design, and making sure lines go up with enough time for people to gamble on them. Also, he would be in charge of yelling at interns.

Wanks would obviously handle the massive amounts of money we would make, making sure that it was handled properly and accounted for. He would also use his British citizenship to start the offshore website.

The Random Guy would handle all UFC and celebrity lines involving things like “Jon and Kate Plus 8″  and also handle all aspects of filling up your email inbox with emails like this one:

Title: Meeting Attendance

Good Day Sir,

We meeting yesterday boss said and important graphics. Efficiency monitor space costs adjustment in the workforce. FaF offers gambling to fit your needs. Click here.

I would of course be in charge of lines that they should have for things but don’t. Here are some:

Over/Under

Number of University of Florida football players to get arrested during the offseason. – 4.5

Number of University of Texas football players to get arrested during the offseason. – 2.5

Number of weeks Michael Vick is suspended by the NFL for dogfighting. – 15

Number of Children named Colt McCoy born in the State of Texas before 2011. – 32.5

Number of teams Tennessee Coach Lane Kiffin will piss off before football season. – 11

Number of souls Nick Saban eats for dinner every night. – 5

Number of virgins sacrificed by LSU fans weekly. – 1

Other lines:

More wins in 2009 Baylor/Texas A&M?

What year will Ricky Rubio finally play in the NBA? – 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012 or later, or will not play

Finally, we would also have a pool in which you could gamble on a number of athletes and their probabilities of using PED’s. We may have no real way of knowing, but we’ll give you a line and take your money anyway.

Picture from here

Advertisement

3 Comments

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.

Comments RSS