May 20th Houston Sports FaF Smear (and Boo, Lakers)

Hooray BEER!!

It's the Birdman, daddy, I'm Fly in any weather

I’m actually starting this post for Wednesday at half-time of the Nuggets/Lakers bout.  Denver has already given up a ten point lead and are now down by one at the end of the second half.  But, we have an affinity for Chris “the Birdman” Andersen around here and I feel relatively confident putting his picture up to start your morning.

The game just ended on a series of miscues that were not indicative of the rest of the game.  This one had the chance to go down as a classic.  Unfortunately with the game on the line 6′-2″Anthony Carter tries to lob a pass over the 6′-10″ Lamar Odom only to have it stolen by Trevor Ariza.  A death blow on a turnover that should never have happened.  Leave Andersen (see above) in the game, give him the responsibilities of that pass and this game could have been yours, Nuggets.

No bueno.  Now we all have to listen to fickle Lakers’ fans chanting “MVP” as Kobe goes to the line twice in the last 30 seconds to seal the game.  You ruined a completely respectable game by Carmelo Anthony (on both sides of the floor, mind you) on a little dinky pass.  Denver, you should be pissed right now.  If not, no worries, I’m taking care of that for you.

After the jump, the rest of your Houston Deportes updates:

TEXANS – David Anderson, you’re off the team.  Take your bags and book it.  Why don’t you go play for the National Football League team in Los Angeles if you’re such a huge Lakers fan?  Oh, that’s right, there’s isn’t one!  David Anderson, you’re fucking out, Ron Artest is fucking in.

ROCKETS – That’s right, Ron Artest wants to stay with the Rockets next year.  The only question I have is whether or not Ron-ron can keep Yao’s brittle feet from snapping every 20 games and can he de-pussify T-Mac?  Because, if the answers are “yes and yes,” that’s money well spent.  Daryl Morey, keep Crazy Eyes in H-town.  Please.  At least for the comic value of the post-practice interviews.

ASTROS – The Astros’ best hitter had to leave the game in the fourth inning due to a cut on his hand.  With Mike Hampton out of the batting line-up all hope was lost.  Pitcher (I’m writing that for my own clarification), Russ Ortiz, replaced Hampton and promptly hit a home-run to no avail.  Houston couldn’t muster enough wood (never been a problem for me) to keep pace with the Brewers falling 4-2.

DYNAMO – I was asked if we ever cover the Houston Dynamo yesterday.  I have a three word answer: Fuck. And. Yes.  They’re FaF’s favorite team because we rank our favorites based on a recency of league championships.  Actually, based on that algorithm that would make the Astros our least favorite (which may not be too far off the mark).  If you’re not up to speed with the Dynamo’s history, they originally were in San Jose before they moved to Houston.  Now San Jose has a new team, the Earthquakes.  San Jose’s fans are still a little bitter over the transfer.  I only have one thing to say to that… Get over it, San Jose.  Seriously, you’re not a sports town.  You can’t even keep a top-seeded team in the playoffs longer than the first round.  So, keep your whining and jeering at home.  Houston hosts San Jose on Saturday at Robertson stadium.

UNIVERSITY of HOUSTON – I was searching for UH sports news, but this seemed a lot more interesting: Some fellow Cougars have come up with an iPhone application to help track the calories burned while you’re walking.  You can compare and compete with similarly app’d iPhone users.  When I’m cool enough to own one, I’ll let you know.  But, I’m not sure that’s as cool as the TXT’N'WALK app.  Virtually eliminating bumping into someone while you’re texting?  I’ll take two.

- Septimus Rex

[Photo from here, but they probably illegally used it... Not on my conscience.]