Septimus Rex
Johnny 5
Pipez
wanksmacgruber
Josh Being Josh
Moose Knuckle
Nobody wants to sex Mutombo (or Yao) when he's on the bench
The Rockets brutally raped the Lakers yesterday. Don’t let the 12 point margin of victory fool you. We were up by 27 at one point, and had at least a 20 point gap for a long stretch in the second half. Battier played like a monster, Lowry and Landry were slashing and jukin’ and jivin’ all game long. Kobe FINALLY got T’d up for being a little bitch.
But we’re not winning this series. We could play like this in the remaining games, and we will not win. It just won’t happen, and I am here to explain why.
The NBA is hurting during the recession, as our friend Bill so eloquently pointed out some time ago. They’re borrowing money from big banks, for fuck’s sake. There’s one way out of these troubles: a monster NBA Finals featuring a guy who was supposed to be the next Michael Jordan (Kobe “No means yes” Bryant), and the guy who probably is the next Michael Jordan (LeBron “My back hurts from carrying this entire city” James.
There is absolutely no way that David Stern will allow a finals match-up that doesn’t include these guys in it. The Rockets maybe had a small chance when the series started, with the odds increasing after the Game 1 victory. But once Yao went down and was pronounced out Saturday night, 1.5 billion Chinese TV sets were turned off. So that means no Chinese viewers for the Finals, and that means no Rockets in the finals.
Everyone has seen it, the no calls on Kobe’s flaying elbows, the usual refereeing bullshit that you see when you KNOW that they want a certain outcome. It just seems to convenient when the out of bounds calls never seem to go your way, and the opposing team gets just too many free throws for it to seem like a normal game. This is how the rest of the series will be for the Rockets. Of course, the NBA will drag it out to 7 games, because its been an exciting series. Douches.
- Wanks MacGruber
Image from The Chron.
5 Comments
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Totally, man. Totally. Follow the money, dude, you’ll find it.
you are a fucking idiot. one of the main reasons that the rockets are still in the game is bcoz of bad calls against the lakers. the flops were called while the hits on the lakers were ignored. you fucking moron!
rockets is what? fifth seed? clearly they are not the better team. but allowing them to play to game 7 helps the nba make more money.
And you really thought the Rockets had a shot at winning over Lakers or any of the top 8 teams in the league? HAHAHA…that is hilarious! you probably don’t watch much NBA game at all….i guess you must be a Houston resident or something, someone who was brain washed perhaps, or a chinese fucking pig who got brain watched by the communists….pure soul…go eat shit !
You know who is classy? Lakers fans.
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